Jumat, 02 Februari 2018

"When you love someone"

I love you more.
I love you more when you're not angry.
I love you more when you're telling me the truth.
I love you more when we kept silent and hugging.

And I know I'm going to miss you a lot. We were always arguing, fighting, but still, there were always jokes between all those arguments and we laughed anyway.
With you I couldn't really be mad. Thinking about leaving you never crossed my mind, even a bit.
There were many right times for us to end this but we never did it anyway.

I didn't know where else to find a man who was so angry but still made jokes and tried to make me laugh.
We talked bluntly about anything, about us, our family, and anything could be a joke.
Everyday spend with you was the best day of my life. Because being with you was all about happiness and turned all the bad things into a good one.

Kamis, 16 November 2017

Let's Just Be Real

We met at the strangest time of my life. I didn't even know where I wanted to go. All that was beyond me was a complete blackness.
I was wandering alone, in a half-consciousness, you came just like that.
At first, I doubted you. Well, in fact I doubted everything around me.
I lost track in what I believe in, because all I knew was nothing and no one could be trusted.
I was too tired to give my heart to someone and to start over again, because I hate disappointment and I hate to fail again. Let's be real here.
But, oddly, since the very first time, we tried to be open about what we felt. You listened to me and I listened to you. We discussed about things that mattered.
Three things that used to be essential to me on dating: book, music, movie. I forgot them just like that because there was even more important issue that connected us as human being: life. Life matters. We talked about life, and in an instant we connected (even we talked about music and movie also).

Our lives. Our past. Our imaginable-future. And most importantly, what we felt that time, in the present. Gradually, you brought back myself to 'the present'.
I couldn't promise you anything, as I didn't expect you to promise me anything either. Let's just be real, let's just be honest, and let's just do our best for 'the present' to make 'the future' possible.

But honestly, I'm scared right now, about the future that awaits me. Really, I might seem like a careless girl who doesn't care about things, but I do, I really do think much about the future and about anything in fact, as I tend to be an overthinking person.
I am afraid of starting a new relationship. I am afraid of failure. I know I am being dramatic. But if I am going to start a new relationship, I want it to be the last, to be real.
I'm happy that you are around. You gave me all the good things you had. Sorry that I was being such a jerk, sometimes treating you badly. But I just wanted to know how you handle things, how you handle me. I just want to be as arrogant as I am, so you can see the worst in me. It's not only about seeing the best in each other, right?

As I knew, you did great. You treated me good, but I didn't know if it was good enough to take us to the next level, or was I good enough for you.
One thing that I knew for sure, once I give you my heart fully, I will love you with all the love that exists in the universe.
So, I wish all the good things for our relationship for the present... and hopefully God will take us to the future. Let's just do our best for our lives right now.

All I want to say is, thank you for helping me to find my way to myself. And I hope we can find ours.
If it's meant to be, it will be.

Kamis, 13 Juli 2017

These times are hard

I know how you feel. It's really sucks that plans don't go as you have wished it to be. Stay positive in such times. Maybe you guys can find another time you can meet. Don't give up. Anything is possible. Don't let one thing break everything you have.
There is nothing harder than being miles from the one person you wish you were an arms reach from. There's nothing more difficult than losing connection when your WiFi sucks. There is nothing worse than going out with your friend and wishing they were sitting right there by your side enjoying the same moments and making the same memories you were. But these sad moments and lonely nights bulid the strongest relationship. You learn how important communication is and how nothing can stop you from loving the one person who has broken down your wall. You cherish the moments you have and take in the everything that others take advantage of. I believe in 'if we're meant to meet again, then we will meet again. It's just not the right time now'. Time will tell. Hwaiting!!

Selasa, 28 Juni 2016

Love Is Patient

Long distance relationships are hard, but they're also incredible. If you can love, trust, respect, support each other from a distance, then you'll be unstoppable once you're physically together

Jumat, 17 Juni 2016

Rabu, 28 Januari 2015

What If

What if I forgave myself? I thought. What if I forgave myself even though I'd done something I shouldn't have? What if I was a liar and a cheat and there was no excuse for what I'd done other than because it was what I wanted and needed to do? What if I was sorry, but if I could go back in time I wouldn't do anything differently than I had done? What if yes was the right answer instead of no? What if what made me do all those things everyone thought I shouldn't have done was what also had got me here? What if i already was?

Kamis, 28 Agustus 2014

Sabtu, 05 Juli 2014


she wasn't exactly sure when it happened or even when it started. all she knew for sure was that right here and now, she was falling hard and she could only pray that he was feeling the same way

Jumat, 27 Juni 2014


A: Do you lie a lot?
B: What do you consider a lot?
A: Enough for people to call you a liar.
B: People call me lots of things.
A: Is one of them liar?
B: I could say no, but how would you know i'm not lying?
A: I guess I could choose to trust you.
B: You can do that?
A: I can try.

Jumat, 16 Mei 2014

Minggu, 16 Maret 2014

Quite the philosopher

I'm thinking that sometimes you just have to make the decision to be happy. Just decide. Things aren't ever what you hoped they'd be. Not ever, for anybody. The only thing that separates one kind of person from another is there are some who stay angry about it and there are some who accept what comes their way.